How do I get a burlesque gig?
Feb 8th
Just got back from a whirlwind of boobs and glitter from the Dallas Burlesque Festival. Great show, great girls, and an amazing audience. I feel lucky and so pleased to have shared the stage with everyone who performed.
I received an email over the weekend from a reader asking about shows. My troupe, Music City Burlesque, gets quite a few similar emails from girls looking to do burlesque, so I thought I’d share with everyone. She writes:
“I’m a burlesque dancer looking for work and I’d love some advice on getting gigs. Thanks girl!” -Katie
First off, getting gigs is great, but it won’t really count as “work.” Although most shows pay, they only pay enough to maybe cover your costume materials expenses, not counting the hours of choreographing, practicing, and the time to actually craft your costume. There are a precious few dancers who make a living off burlesque, and most of those also either teach classes, in the case of Michelle L’Amour and Indigo Blue or brand themselves through books and makeup, like Dita Von Teese. The rest of us do burlesque for various reasons, but money isn’t one of them. Just an aside, since I get a lot of questions about how much we make dancing.
I’m assuming you’re a new dancer and don’t have any contacts in the business. If you’re a new dancer, it’s kind of hard to get out there because troupes and venues want to know what you’ve done. A great way to get your first show is to take classes and perform in a student showcase. That’s how I got my start in burlesque, and I learned a lot from the other girls in my class as well as my teachers. Of course, you may not be in an area where that’s available. If that’s the case, you need to make an audition video, with your full makeup and finished routine, and finished costume. It doesn’t matter if it’s in your living room and the lighting quality sucks, this is to show prospective people that you’re serious and have put in the time to finish a routine. Photos are always a plus even if it’s just a myspace of facebook page.
Are you in an area with lots of burlesque or not so much? Do a little research to see what kind of burlesque or sideshow is happening in your area. If you’re lucky enough to be in a mecca of burlesque, start going to lots of shows. Dress up and talk to performers afterward if they’re open to it. Don’t pitch yourself, just mention that you liked their performance and see if they have a website or facebook. If you can network and meet people beforehand, you’ll stand out when you send them your pitch.
If you live in an area with no burlesque, don’t despair! Burlesque is constantly growing and becoming more mainstream. Keep looking, and start a meetup group for those interested in burlesque. If you can find a venue, there are plenty of touring acts that you could help bring to town. If you live within driving distance of a burlesque troupe, make the trip to see one of their shows, and see if they’d be interested in coming to do a show near you.
Once you’ve made contact with a troupe, it’s time to send them your pitch. Mention you’ve seen their show and talked to performer X. Ask if they ever host guest performers and list all your finished routines and the accompanying music. Include links to your photos and the aforementioned video. Be courteous and willing to do anything. They may ask you to work the merchandise booth at a show or to stage kitten (picking up discarded performer clothing onstage) before asking you to perform.
Booking non-burlesque shows, like opening for a band, are a little trickier. You could contact a specific venue directly or a specific band directly giving the same information you would give to a troupe. Do your research and make sure you’re pitching appropriately. In other words don’t pitch a classic fan dance to a pop-punk band.
Keep in mind that certain states have laws about nudity in bars. In Nashville, if we perform anywhere that serves alcohol, we must wear a quarter bra (covering under boob and side boob) and full panties. If you violate that law and someone reports it, the venue, not you, gets fined. If a venue has been burned by performers not obeying the law, they may never let burlesque be performed there again, so don’t take it to heart if a venue flat out refuses you because you do burlesque.
Be persistent. Keep watching shows and even youtube videos to better yourself and be more knowledgeable about the burlesque scene and how it’s evolving. Get involved however you can and always be nice to everyone. This is a really small world and if you’re rude or a diva, it’ll be hard to get more gigs.
Hope that helps my would be ecdysiasts!
Popularity: 47% [?]
The Demoiselles: Yoga Guru
Feb 3rd
Just wanted to give you all a heads up that I have signed on with the awesome gals who run The Demoiselles as a yoga expert for their Getting Healthy series. I’ll be posting bi-monthly reports on how to live more like a yogi, good stretches poses you can do at home or in the office, and maybe some reviews as well.
An excerpt from my first post, an insight into my own yoga journey:
“My work life was fairly miserable. I gained 20 lbs in about six months. Desperate for a change in my life, I started taking a yoga class.
I almost quit after that first class. It was hard. It was physically as well as mentally demanding. I learned I had almost no balance or strength, two things I thought very necessary in yoga. But that night after I came home, I felt wonderful. My muscles ached, but in a way that said ‘please try this again sometime.’ My mind felt less cluttered, and my busy-nature felt delightfully slowed. I was hooked.”
Check out the rest of my post here, and be sure to look at all the amazing stories of their other Getting Healthy writers!
Popularity: 43% [?]
Snow Shoot
Feb 1st
It snowed in Nashville. Let me stress, in the past 20 or so years people I know have lived here, it has never snowed as much as it did this weekend. I got stir crazy the second day, and suggested a photoshoot in the snow in lingerie and high heels would be fun. Lucky for me, Chad McClarnon, a local photographer, saw my tweet and was in the same mood. Yay for Twitter! Chilly, yes, but also steamy.
Here are a few of the goods. All photos Chad McClarnon:
gloves: vintage
sheer kimono: bought at boutique in South Africa
skivvies: Gilligan and O’Malley for Target
faux fur coat: vintage
dress: TJ Maxx
Popularity: 73% [?]
Words with Weight -Jan 27th
Jan 27th
I’m working on deadline right now for some other writing gigs (whee!) so here’s a little taste of what I’ve been reading:
“ What is certain is this: On the afternoon of January 2, 1863, something appalling burst out from the basement and tore a trail of havoc from the house on Denny Hill to the central business district, and then back home again.
Few witnesses agree, and fewer still were granted a glimpse of the Incredible Bone-shaking Drill Engine. Its course took it under the earth and down the hills, gouging up the land beneath the luxurious homes of wealthy mariners and shipping magnates, under the muddy flats where sat the sprawling sawmill, and down along the corridors, cellars, and storage rooms of general stores, ladies’ notions shops, apothecaries, and yes… the banks.
Four of the major ones, where they were lined up in a row—all four of those banks were ravaged as their foundations were ground into mulch. Their walls rattled, buckled, and fell. Their floors collapsed downward in a V-shaped implosion as their bottom buttresses dropped away, and then the space was partially filled with the toppling roofs. And these four banks held three million dollars or better between them, accumulated from the California miners cashing in their nuggets and heading north in search of more.”
- Boneshaker by Cherie Priest
Popularity: 50% [?]
Grit and Glamour -Jan 25th
Jan 25th
Make Something! Spend a day perfectly encapsulated in another era. 20s, 40s, whatever rings your bell Start a new saying like “mungry” (munchies hungry) use it casually and act shocked when no one knows what it means Create a shrine in your room that contains all your dreams Do housework in nothing but sexy lingerie and high heels Have a dinner party where each person brings part of the dish Donate something to the Haiti relief: you’ll feel wonderful and know that you’re helping Wear a wig and large sunglasses to the grocery store: be anonymous Watch a foreign film or TV show without subtitles Make ice candles Find a muse Practice your acceptance speech in the shower Make up your own constellations Thrift and play ridiculous old board games like Sweet Valley High and Gambler Make up your own rules Wear false eyelashes Make anonymous acts of kindness every week See how many pieces of bubble gum you can chew at once: blow giant bubbles Get a mortar and pestle: use at every possibility Get awful fake nails at the pharmacy
Popularity: 49% [?]
Horror Movie Work Out Plan: Week 1
Jan 22nd
“I’m sorry I called you a meatloaf, Jack.” -An American Werewolf in London
Whew, the mister and I are a bit over the week 1 point of the HMWP. The first week, I felt great. The last two days, have sucked. I feel a little like poor zombie Jack up there, feeling like a meatloaf and falling apart every time I move. My muscles feel droopy with any sort of weights, my mind isn’t calm so much as sleepy, and my running looks more like a weird wobble.
In short, I think I’m lacking the motivation that true terror inspires. Tonight I plan to watch Paranormal Activity, which I’ve planned on seeing for a while now.
If there’s a horror film you think I should see, comment below, or add to the conversation on twitter.
Off to strength training! In the meantime:
Popularity: 57% [?]
Shameless Self Exposure
Jan 20th
Hello lovelies!
I have a ton of burlesque shows coming up, and thought I’d let you all know the whens and wheres in case you wanted to come see me shimmy 
Feb 5th and 6th I will be performing at the Dallas Burlesque Festival! This is my first fest and I’m so thrilled to be included among a great group of performers.
Feb 13th I’ll be joining forces with Nashville’s original burlesque troupe, Panty Raid!, in their Valentines Day extravaganza at Exit/In.
Feb 20th is Burlesque for Arts’ Sake featuring me and some of my Music City Burlesque ladies at Studio 1406 in East Nashville.
Feb 21st I’ll be modeling for Dr. Sketchy’s Anti-Art School Nashville. It’s a valentine’s theme, and I’ve got some fun props and dance up my velvet gloves.
March 6th I’ll be in Franklin, TN performing in The Pond’s weekly variety show.
Then on March 26th, Music City Burlesque is throwing our 2nd Annual Spring Break Show at the historic Belcourt Theatre.
I currently working out more travel plans for burlesque-ing, with a trip to Chicago in the future, and likely a Seattle jaunt as well. If you’re interested in booking me or know of any awesome shows I should go to or be in, let me know!
Popularity: 75% [?]
How to Brew the Perfect Cup of Tea
Jan 18th
via
Tea can be many things, a cup of comfort, an invigorating jolt of energy, or a daily ritual of relaxation. Rudyard Kipling even believed tea had the power to hold worlds together.
We had a kettle; we let it leak:
Our not repairing made it worse.
We haven’t had any tea for a week…
The bottom is out of the Universe.”
All this from the simple Camella sinensis plant. Whatever tea means to you, making a perfect brew will help you keep your universe from bottoming out.
- You’ll need:
- fresh or bottled water
- tea kettle
- your favorite mug
- loose leaf tea
- milk, honey, sugar, or the sweetener of your choice
Water
Always use fresh water in your kettle. If your tap water is particularly chlorinated or polluted, use filtered water instead. Start with cold water, as it retains the most oxygen.
Tea
Loose leaf is generally a better brew than ground tea bags, and almost always fresher. Use one teaspoon for every cup you want to brew. If you add a lot of milk and sugar, or are making more than two cups, add one extra teaspoon to your teapot.
There are four basic and distinct types of tea, black, green, oolong, and white. Black teas are oxidized, oolong are partially oxidzed, and greens and whites are not. Your brewing will depend on which type you’re using.
- Black, Red, or Oolong Tea
Black teas are oxidized (exposing the tea to air). This allows the tea to naturally chemically change from green to a red or brown, and intensifies the flavor. If you like full-bodied richness and complex flavors, these are the teas for you.For darker teas, heat your water until it boils, or your kettle whistles. Immediately add the water to your tea and allow it to steep for three to five minutes, depending on how dark and bitter you like it.
- Green Tea
Green teas are not oxidized and instead are withered and dried. Green teas are a good choice if you like a fresh drink that will help clear your mind.Green teas are better if you take your kettle off right before it boils, or add a small amount of cold water to quickly cool your water. Green and teas should be steeped for about three minutes. Any longer and the tannins will start to make it bitter.
- Oolong Tea
Oolong tea is only partially oxidized, making it somewhere between a black and green tea. Drink oolong for a digestive aid, or if you want a mix of the astringent and richness found in greens and blacks respectively.You can prepare it either way, but the flavors are richer if prepared similar to green tea.
- White Tea
White tea is the most delicate of all teas. Similar to green tea, it is not oxidized and is instead simply steamed and dried. White teas are generally light and fragrant.For full flavor, white tea should be made at a similar, cooler than boiling, temperature. White teas need a full seven minutes to bring out their full flavors.
One Lump or Two?
This is personal preference, but it will affect how you brew and steep your tea. Do you like your tea very sweet and creamy? Or do you prefer a hint of sweetness with bitter? Decide ahead of time whether you will take milk, sugar, honey, or anything else and let that guide your steeping times and amount of loose tea.
Enjoy
Ambiance also influences the perfection of your brew, so make yourself a comfortable space with a good book, or have a few teacakes on hand if you’re entertaining. Turn on some music, just hold that warm mug in your hands and let the scent waft into your senses. Once you feel covered in the sweet smell and feel, take a tiny sip. Feel it warm your whole being and bones. Repeat as necessary.
Now, put the kettle on and call some friends for an impromptu tea party.
Popularity: 66% [?]
The Horror Movie Work Out Plan
Jan 15th
From the 1964 film “Party Beach”
I love horror movies. The good ones are terrifying in a such a satisfying way, and the bad ones are chock full of cheesy gore and hilariously bad dialogue. They quicken my heartbeat and make me happy to be alive, and happy to be scared in a safe way.
I hate working out. Let me rephrase, I love moving my body and getting energized, but I hate the disconnected feeling of working out for working out sake, or the idea of getting a supermodel body. pah!
But since I work in publishing, my life consists of me sitting and hunched over a computer all day, not the most advantageous for physical health. Also, what of the zombie-pocalypse? I’m pretty sure us desk jockeys will be the first to go.
So what’s a girl to do? Can I out-run zombies, battle back mutated monsters, have the acrobatics to slide unnoticed by homicidal maniacs, and the peace of mind to endure the goriest of situations? And perhaps most importantly, can I look good while doing it all?
I’m embarking on a three month quest to find out if I’d survive a horror movie. It’s called the Horror Movie Work Out Plan. The Plan includes workouts important in any horror film: running, hand to hand combat (Kenpo), yoga, core work, strength training, plyometrics, and burlesque dancing (for the looking good part). Six days a week, with one day of rest, to be spent studying horror films for possible situations.
Let’s start with the opening stats:
Freya:
- Speed: Level 0 – Slower than a dessicated corpse with one leg, and less running stamina
- Agility and Flexibility: Level 1 – Able to balance on the rafter, but not avoid the machete wielding maniac. Flexible enough to quickly squeeze into that crawlspace however.
- Strength: Level 0 – Wimpy, wimpy, wimpy. I could never hold back or barricade the doors against an oncoming horde
- Stamina: Level 1 – After a few minutes of hard work, I turn into a huffing tomato, red all over. Definitely no match for psycho killers
- Will: Level 2 – Pretty cool, but cracks under risk of death
- Charisma: Level 2 – Sidekick status, but not a survivor
*note: my statistics are unscientific except that they are based on Dungeons and Dragons and video games.
If “get in shape” was on your list of New Years Resolutions, why not join the HMWP? We’ll have a weekly post to discuss different work out programs, what’s working, what’s not, horror movie reviews in regards to both the villians’ physical qualities and the protagonists’ survival strategies, and interviews with both horror and fitness aficionados to bolster our spirits for those last five crunches.
Leave your stats in the comments and if you’re an expert interested in doing a review, just scream.
Popularity: 100% [?]
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